Night of the Iguana...

His name is Russell...and when I first agreed to house sit, my thought was
"Hey, an iguana..no big deal. I can handle that" Now, ask me if I can house
sit for a tarantula and I would first have a cardiac arrest and then second say
"You are out of your dang mind..."
When I saw Russell, I sort of choked on my own saliva first and then
immediately gave him a new name...GOLIATH. He's a small dragon as far as I'm
concerned. He's in a cage in the garage that is as big as my room at my
apartment. They told me I didn't have to do much, just feed him here and there.
Well, when I get over there to go over the feeding details, that was
modified...or a little more involved than I was thinking..
I have to cut up collard greens for him (not a big deal) and then take them out
to him. Here's where it gets complicated and slightly...frightening. I have to
put these industrial gloves on, open the cage at both ends and rest the top of
it on my head so it stays open. I have to put my hand out so that Goliath
doesn't DIVE BOMB my face (yes, I was warned he may dive bomb) and pet him with
one hand while the other hand is laying down his small harvest. Imagine this
for a minute if you will...a cage top resting on my head, one shaky hand trying
to pet a small dragon who I'm sure breathes fire, the other shaky hand putting
his food in there, silently hoping I leave this scene alive. I think I actually
don't breathe until the cage is shut and I say OUTLOUD "Thank you Jesus,
another successful feeding without dive bombs".