Really?? You're gonna tell me that?

Last night I'm on my way home and my cousin Matty calls me. Now, let me preface
this story with the fact that Matty is the KING of jokes, laughing, and
practical pranks. Very rarely is her serious but when he is working..he doesn't
mess around. He turns into Mr. professional..which is a good thing since he
deals with numbers, money, and people. Well, he starts the conversation off
like this.."Wanna know how my day got started today??..." He then proceeds to
tell me that he has this lady (customer) come into his office and as he's
working on the computer crunching numbers and her stomach starts to gurgle
something fierce. You all know that akward feeling of when yours or someone in
a quiet room starts to make noise and you sorta want to get up and leave?
Yeah..I call that bubble guts. HATE THAT..anyway, Matty says to the lady "Oh,
you must be hungry" (it's the polite thing to do to make that other person a
little less comfortable wouldn't you agree??). She then says "No, I'm pooping
my pants". PAUSE.........Come again? Yes..she said it and then repeated to him
"Don't you think it's great that I can sit here and crap my pants? I got a
Colostomy Bag back in 2005 so I don't have to leave when I need to poop..."
PAUSE........Definition: A removable, disposable bag that attaches to the
exterior opening of a colostomy to permit sanitary collection and disposal of
bodily wastes. PAUSE.....After a moment of utter shock and embarrassment for
Matty he quickly called in an associate to help her..in another area. Morale of
this little story? When you have bubble guts..tell people you must be hungry.